He says things such as "I don't dance" and "I don't enjoy night-game environments (bars/clubs)" and "the friends I could go out with are just uninteresting" and other things.
Knowing that you need to look at the fundamentals root of things, I see an underlying trend.
These are just excuses.
Here's a personal account. I used to say I hated going to the beach during the day. In reality, I was just socially uncomfortable at the beach.
The same thing is going on here. I'd be willing to bet this individual is just self-conscious of his dancing, self-conscious of himself and too caring of the people around him at clubs/bars, and not able to let go and enjoy the moment.
When someone says they don't like to do something that is almost universally fun, they are probably just uncomfortable.
This isn't some sort of revolutionary idea. I know people who hate clubs but who enjoy them when they are there, but those people don't make the excuses. The excuses are your clue to the inner workings of the individual.
The person depicted here has a terrible case of giving-a-shit. It's an unfortunate illness where upon you care what other people think of you to the extent that it stifles your ability to enjoy yourself.
Fuck people. At the risk of sounding like a Roosh groupie, I'll quote something from one of his most recent posts titled "7 Things I Would Tell My Teenage Self:"
"5. Stop being concerned about what other people think of you. They don’t care about you. They are so wrapped up in their own insecurities and what you think of them that you’re wasting your energy trying to get accepted by strangers. Take risks, fuck everyone else, and note down what you learn. If you’re not making a lot of mistakes, you’re not doing enough."This is pretty solid advice for anybody. The last line is of ultimate importance. Make mistakes, and enjoy the ride.
Remember Law #1
Have Fun.
"Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!"
— Hunter S. Thompson
Did you ever consider that maybe your friend just doesn't like the types of people that clubs attract?
ReplyDeleteI've spent a lot of time in bars/clubs myself, and only went because I was forcing myself to be there to practice game.
Obnoxiously loud music, obnoxiously drunk women, and obnoxious guys trying to get into the pants of those women. It's not exactly my definition of fun. Yes, having a good time with your friends is fun. Yes, dancing is fun. Yes, getting drunk is usually fun.
But all those obnoxious things just tend to ruin the fun for me.
With regards to my friend, its a comfort issue. This is because I know him well enough.
ReplyDeleteThis is why I said they are "probably" uncomfortable. There are surely people who just dislike clubs, like there are people who like and dislike comic books and pizza.
My question to you is, why are these people obnoxious? Is this something inherent in their behavior or a way that you perceive the behavior?
Could you just stop caring/thinking about their obnoxiousness? Think about your answers to these questions.